Day 15 - The truth

So i came to know about that what i had been trying to get a ring of for like a month now. O says on my back that he is shit scared of me because the way i talk; loudly, that is. and he imitated me too behind my back. 
this is so weird and so wrong in so many places. he is scared of me? did he ever talk to me in real life? oh he did. on the recent field trip and i wasn't even one bit of a loud at that time. he just heard me at some stupid concert and that's when he came up with this assumption. mind blowing.
you know what? i have really begun to hate people, now. and thinking that O thinks this was is a tad bit saddening because i thought he would think good of me but no. i got it all wrong. i always get it wrong. and when now i begin to actually see through people, what they think of me, what kind of face they make behind my back i actually really see as if everybody thinks of me as one heck of a weirdo. i'm not that difficult to understand, nor have i created an invisible wall of glass around me that i won't let anyone in. 
from my childhood till now, i have never ever got a real friend, a friend about who i can know for sure that no matter what she would make stuff work out for me without me telling to her or sth, who wouldn't consider me as one heck of a weirdo. 
1. i don't talk behind people
2. i don't actually humiliate them - having fun is sth different, i never actually insult people intentionally 
3. i never put blame on people and often take it on my shoulders, boldly 
that still makes me a lot better than about 70% of the world population, then why am i always made to be felt like a left out or an odd one out? why am i so difficult to to be accepted? When did i lose my inner peace and started caring about what people had to say. wasn't i better before. innocent, careless, satisfied? what has happened to me 

Day 14 - Dear world

Dear world, 
i do not hate you but your residents. why do they have to be such control freaks; dictating how everyone's every situation should be like? enlightening you with their worthy suggestions when legends have it, that they actually do not matter. 
People are so judgmental (even if this line is pretty judgmental on my part) and moreover they wouldn't listen to you about what happened with you but to the other people who merely saw that happening that have a lot of spice to bring down their appetite of the juiciest gossip. The gossip doesn't need to be true, it just has to have something that ruins the image of the prey and gives them people more stuff to chew on. 
Enough.
On a side note. i realized my brother is a genius! he so epicly observed the current situation in the house and came up with a wonderful piece of poetry i couldn't have imagined of writing in my whole freaking life. he is definitely a potential poet. But how to bring this up to the world? me thinks i should start a blog which includes his poems only. 

Day 07 - The world never fails to amaze me

And another one of those extreme rage moments has taken over, when i practically want to diss someone so bad that he/she starts crying of shame.


Every family has that one skunk-face moron that habitually insults that other actually-an-awesome person (of the same family) for reasons, only God knows. No one on this planet has the legal right by any law or norm to malign someone to shit and spread any sort of scuttlebutt about him, although the kind humanity who fights real hard for the preservation of animal entitlement, leaves not even a single chance of not violating the fundamental law of human rights 'conservation'; tis always ignored by him. how ironic. we are more concerned about animal rights than our fellow human beings'!


You live in a foreign land, you utter good lingua franca (read: english), you dress the way what is generally not very appreciated in your culture and behold! you have the legitimate right to


        i) talk to someone whenever YOU want to and stop talking when you don't feel like it
        ii) swear in english to show the other person how inferior he is
        iii) whenever that by-all-means-inferior-to-you guy tells you his secret, spread the news
        iv) don't give an eff about his opinions and publicly humiliate him by your ostrich-expressions, eye-(that look like toad's)rolling, talk-to-the-hand


This is what this world has taught me. Yes.


P.S. Don't take me wrong. I'm not a hater. but sometimes when this is what i see happening around me, more like a usual routine, i do get pissed off. A lot. because being superior to all sorts of creatures we are supposed to respect each other, love each other and not hate, or slag off. when will this world learn to love, i wonder. 

Day 05 - i do not hate the world but i hate 99% of the people inhabiting it.

You know what the first thing a human baby does, after he is expelled from the womb? he breathes? no. opens his eyes? no. he effin cries! cries for he knows that he has entered a world of bitch-face hypocrites, who will no matter what they say at your face will always say exactly the opposite behind your back. they will hate you for your success but at the same time hale you for it. it will take his whole life to understand this hell; what he calls a world, and when by the end of his life he will finally come to know how the world works, it won't matter anymore, for he would have grown old just like a worn out tyre.


i do not hate the world but i hate 99% of the people inhabiting it.